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Monday, August 24, 2015

Try, Try, Try, Why?...

I try and I try and I try again and look what it's done for me? Not a fucking thing. I don't need to hear anymore fucking useless drivel. I need to see the one who had made this an impossible situation own up and take responsibility for her lies and FIX THE FUCKING PROBLEM. Too many instances where she created big messes and ran away from responsibility leaving people's lives in shambles. It's time to ACT like the new spiritually enlightened creature your claiming to be and not just putting on a show to impress and deceive everyone. You have hurt me in the worst way and have no conscience concerning what your lies and manipulation have caused. You want to blame it all on alcohol and drugs. But that doesn't cut it, no matter what s bunch of AA game players say. So get off your ass and quit faking ta bunch of garbage and fix what you broke in your selfish ego filled spoiled ways. I want my job back and I want my life back and I want I you to pay for your evil ways. It should be you in jail and for twice as long as I got stuck there. You committed perjury, endangered a child, co signed a child molester's deeds, lied that I threatened you, set it up where I'd catch you screwing the molester, drove by me repeatedly followed by the idiot to make sure I knew you were going to the motel, took a photo of yourself in front off the room complete with your bra under the stack of shit in your arms, posted it on line, hacked my Google account numerous times, followed me on Google+ and when I blocked you sent me a request to be in my circles, called me from the mall and the hospital begging me to come see you then claiming I was stalking you, called me when I was at Mac Donalds asking me why I didn't tell you about the bastard, sent me emails to check out your phony ass posts, etc., etc., etc., on and on. Even pulling up to talk to me and tell me you didn't mind if I worked on Julie's house out drop my dog off when I went to work and then following me when I did and calling the fucking ass hole sheriff and telling then some lie to get me arrested. Your a fucking low life pieces of scum and it's time you owned up to your filthy disgusting behavior. You put on a great act but behind it all is a worthless slut who will do anything to maintain her free ride. You don't care how many lives you screw over as long as you get your way. I can honestly say I have never hated another person as much as I do you. I wish I could forget I ever knew you. But I can't when I'm constantly reminded of your evil because it affects everything in my life. And it had destroyed me from the inside. I hope you slip and get drink and then get in your car like you always did and crash into a another car where someone I'd gravelly injured and you spend 10 years in prison with that eating away at you. But you have no conscience so it probably won't bother you at all. Your a piece of shit and I HATE YOU! Again, I HATE YOU! Eat shit and fucking die...

So how do I get this anger out of me? I have tried and tried but since the cause won't un-cause it, won't even deal with it honestly, I'm stuck in this anger pool and I find no way out. I have to battle with a label I don't deserve while my own handicaps are more than enough to overcome. The real pisser is that the chain she threw around my neck is the greatest handicap of all. And it got there from her lies, manipulation and deceit. All because she couldn't own up to what was really going down. Because she doesn't seem to want to take responsibility for her part in it all.

Steps 4 & 9 are definitely being skipped in her version of 12 Steps. I doubt she will ever even truly submit to step 1.  She will never say anything had power over herself. Not the mighty Wonder Woman who can do anything. Anything but tell the truth and right her wrongs. She's never wrong. Yet she's never been right...

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