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Monday, August 31, 2015

Begin Another Week...

Monday morning is here and another week begins. I've never been a fan of Monday and nothing has changed to made me feel any different. What had changed, I noticed, is that while writing used to be such a great therapy to me it's not that way anymore. It still is a way for me to release anger that builds up but it doesn't open up my imagination and spark the creative forces in me. Where I used to feel there was so much I wanted to write that I couldn't keep up with the flow now I'm stuck with nothing I want to put into a sentence and paragraphs are too much to consider. What I feel more is that I can't put into words how angry and frustrated I feel. That the anger is so pervasive that it becomes consuming and instead of thoughts flowing freely they get twisted up and crushed by the anger. And there is no answer to how I can overcome the anger and put it out of my thoughts. It dominates my entire thought process and taints everything I am. My attitude is negative and I am nasty as a result. I try to think positively and set my mind to something but almost immediately the anger overtakes me. When someone has been so evil and caused so many problems that won't go away there is no way to just forget it and go forward. The problems it created stay there and cause more problems every minute of everyday. And all I can envision is her smirky attitude and thinking what a great accomplishment it is for her. Like get boasting of the damage she had done to others on the past. It doesn't matter that she hurt people who she shouldn't have only that she caused them great problems so therefore she "won". Like marrying someone so her daughter wouldn't "win". A sick evil mind that claims to have found God. I hope God finds her and shows her what He thinks of her wins...

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