September Last Year...

I wrote on September 30th of last year "You Said You Loved Me......But You Lied". I re read out and I still can't believe it went down that way. But it did. And it's wasted almost an entire year. Of coarse 6 of them were the biggest waste sitting in jail. And you still want to make me the monster. Who played the monster in all y the rest off the Domestic Violence cases you had back east? You really are something...

I Feel So Much Anger...

After my little encounter I am still reeling in anger. That she had that attitude is what pisses me of mostly.  And that she was able to pull the crap she did to me. She is fucked up in the head. She I is the dangerous one. Look at the mug shot from Oregon. I hate her. She should be locked in a cage. Shock therapy and a lobotomy. A muzzle and a straight jacket. I'm not liking this. But who wouldn't be angry?

It Breaks My Heart More...

It just breaks my heart even more that she had this attitude and promotes it in her grandson. I admit that I had fallen in love with her and I've had a tough y time dealing with it with the way things played l out. But when she continues to act like this it just does y things up inside me even more. I haven't had closeure yet. I've tried but it hasn't happened. Mostly because she did a big 180 a year ago and went from "I'm almost 52 years old and I can't believe I feel this way for you!" to acting like I'm a monster ready to devour her. To sending me George Strait "Cross My Heart" to calling the sheriff and making up lies. It makes no sense. And I'm left out in the wilderness barely surviving. I've lost most everything I still had, including my mom's ashes and family history. I lost a good job. I've lost my heart. And I've lost nut drive...

I just want the poison to end and the stupidity to stop. That's all. I want my life back. Is that now a crime? Then punish it with the death penalty. This it's no way to live...

Rude Interruption...

Sitting at Safeway cooling off in the shade with Xz laying on the cool cement and up pulls the liar. Gives me a dirty look and acts like she had to physically guard her grandson from the monster. I have to hate her. She fabricated such a story she needs a prize for it. If she didn't damage my life so much I'd laugh. But she did and I want her to pay dearly for that. Do Good get her with that karma. Hey her real good. For now I'll just hate her and remember she has only darkness inside.

Getting Old...

I really don't like getting old. Not when so much is in need of fixing in my life. It's that gloom hovering over me because so much is broken and time is running out to make things right before I retire and wait for the end. Things that will bring regret will be ten times worse. And so many things will be regretted and the few things I would have to warm my soul have been ripped away. It brings a negative go to my every thought. I can't even put it in words only feel it inside. I will fight the thought but it still still take a toll. And I remember on January 1st I wrote of how the new year looked so promising only to have a nut case liar stomp the life out of my hopes. Nothing good ever goes unpunished.

The Real Crime...

I was accused of a serious crime and paid a big price when, in fact, I did none of what I was accused of except for being on the wrong side of the street because of some idiotic boundaries put in place because of a total lie to begin with. Yet I have had my job and my life taken from me, as well as a lot of other things, like losing my storage, etc., all because of a drunken dope fiend and her delusional insanity. That is the real crime. And as I gaze discovered in my research she had a track record of these same things. She has more domestic violence, restraining order cases in her past than I ever imagined. Even being charged by her now hubby with abuse by threat. And much, much more much, much worse things. But the fucking idiot sheriff and DA are do fucking stupid they never looked at her record. And never mind that what she does and what she claims are opposites. She is pathological liar. She may believe what she tells people but it's not the truth. She twists things around like a pretzel. And the mess I'm left with has made my life a miserable existence. Do Fuck all of you bastards and eat shit. That's my thoughts to you. Fuck you!

I Want My World Back...

I want my life back to where it was 6 months ago. I had a good job and my life was improving a little more each day. And then the whole thing got torn from me and, yes, I do blame her. Completely.

It's funny but the very first Blog I did was the very first time I Blogged in this Blog it was about a female who had turned my world upside down time and time again and then I'd had enough and I an end to it. And it worked great. So I made my blog about my house fire and what the county put me through. Then after a year it switched to the toxic relationship I was caught up in. That's something that is only going to get better when God decides to pull back his grace and He sends karma in to deal with it. That day will come. Soon, I can only hope. But all it's done up until now is cause me undeserved problems and kept me depressed and unfocused. No more. Not now. We'll see...

It's sad to realize that she was a big phony all the time, and still is. It's just not good that now for the rest of all time I will just have to hate her. Because that's what she made of it. Good riddance.