I just re read the IM's Back To April of 2014. We did argue a lot and she would push my buttons. But I would get angry and get nasty too many times. I can see her point there. But she never saw what she did to me when she put me down constantly. She didn't see how always accusing mgr of being with someone else hurt because I never wanted anyone else. But she would always McKee me believe she was communicating with someone else. And I'd always take the bait. Yes, it was toxic. But it's how she ended it and made me out to be some monster that I'm not. I was nasty at times. That's hour I get when I'm pushed. It's m not a justification for a felony. It's not a reason to put on a front that your fucking a jerk - whether you are or not - and hurt me. I was up against a person spun out on drugs and alcohol and doing very bizarre things and acting just like she said she once was and trying to set things up for disaster. It's so wrong to manipulate people and you with their emotions. It's wrong to yank their chains and hurt them. Not when you told them you loved them no matter what state of mind you were in. It's just wrong. It causes too many problems. There were so many options that would have solved it all. Easy options. But you choose to destroy me as the option. That's sick. And what you caused was a deep rooted hatred that may never be overcome. It was selfish and wrong. And to add to it by putting thoughts into a young boy's mind of something that is only on your sick mind I'd wrong, wrong, wrong... And remember, you were the one that nurtured this relationship and continued it and still won't admit to it. Just reading the IM's dispels any doubts. They show how toxic it was, yes, but it does also how deep that it got. But you'll never admit such an embarrassing fact. That you would be that involved with the likes of me. A worthless homeless bozo. How should I feel that people s would think I'd fall for someone like you? I don't have a problem with false pride. So I don't worry much on that.
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